Your Homophobia Sucks, Pause

What is a heterosexual male's biggest fear?  To be robbed at gunpoint in a dark alley...Nope.  To fall in love with a girl who's reputation is bursting at the seams leaking HOE everywhere... Ummm, nah!  To wake up from a drunken night tied to a bed surrounded by butt naked midgets with whips and whipped cream all chanting a sexy umpa lumpa ritual song... weird, but not that either...

Biggest Fear: Being confused as a homosexual man

Is homosexuality really that terrible?  Or better yet, is what other people think of you really that important?  I hate it when people swear on their unborn children and sometimes on their living children that some celebrity is UBER gay... ie, Kayne, Neyo, Diddy... but keep it real, they can, are and will get more girls than any of the gossipers will  ever dream of cuz no matter how gay we speculate them to be, their MONEY is straighter than Indian hair.  Find a better gossip, or better yet, retire from gossiping!  What they eat don't... you know how it goes...

I've had many grown men tell me they could deal with their sons being serial killers and ax murderers, but let that son of a gun turn out gay!  These fathers would blow, pause, their own heads off!  And speaking of pause... OHH EMM GEE... as a young whipper snapper recording songs off the radio, PAUSE was the absolute button of choice, as it never let me down!  Never in a million years would I have predicted it to be the absolute word of choice for the heterosexual man. 

1. You crazy for hating on Lebron going to the Heat... I like Bron Bron... PAUSE.
2. Ay yo my man, I'm tryna do this modeling thing, right, right... know where I can get some head shots.. PAUSE.
3. Shorty, this steak house is the truth... the meat just melts in my mouth... MEGA PAUSE.

Do you think Sebastian or Zachery or Bob or Jackson are pausing on the golf course or in their big executive meetings?  Do you think they're pausing to their FA's when they find out the returns on their investments is going to blow their minds?  Did Biggie pause when he told that girl she looked so good made him wanna suck on her daddy's.... you know the song...

Wish I could venture back to the mid nineties when I was recording Aaliyah songs off the radio, when I purchased my Harlem World cassette tape, when I had Immature posters on my wall courtesy of Right-On Magazine, when we were pop-locking on the kiddie skate floor at Skate 22, when our biggest and only fear was the rumor that Homie da Clown was murdering kids and we swore we saw him on top of the building out my 5th grade window... back then, no one was questioning your sexuality or who you were... no pressures to defend your identity, cuz you were too busy trying to create an identity.  Now we're so busy defending an image we're letting OTHERS dictate.  An image we have to live with.  An image that should reflect what we value and believe in.  Otherwise, we wouldn't be so excessively and obsessively self conscious with extreme insecurity issues... And maybe, just maybe, this whole gay/lesbian epidemic that seems to be happening would simmer down cuz all those who are indulging in it as a "fad" would abandon their deviant behavior!  How do you think the REBEL is born, he seeks what is feared and embraces it.  But that's another issue all together...

For the pausing man, believe me when I tell you, a five letter word DOES NOT void a seemingly gay statement you've made.  Besides, your walk and that soft voice 10 years past puberty is a dead giveaway!  Just kidding!  Seriously, if your confidence level outweighs your pausing, you would be able to stand here in a Speedo and be looked at like a fudge'in hero... (Kanye's a confident lyrical genius, gay or not)

Like Jadakiss said, a real man shouldn't have to say NO HOMO... EYEListen.

YOUR HOMOPHOBIA SUCKSSSSSSS... pause.

Quotes To Live By

"I am the author of my life.  Unfortunately I'm writing in pen and I can't erase my mistakes."

- Unknown

99 Years of Que ΩΨΦ

Throw ya HOOKS up, my brothers of Omega Psi Phi!!

Today, November 17th, the bruhz of ΩΨΦ celebrate 99 years of brotherhood, commitment and service!  On this day, in 1911, four black, educated, inspired men came together to found the first black fraternal organization to be founded at a historically black college.  Edgar A. Love, Oscar J. Cooper, Frank Coleman, and Ernest E. Just, combined with vision and determination, came together to build this organization on the cardinal principles of Manhood, Scholarship, Perseverance and Uplift.  And after choosing the Greek initials meaning "FRIENDSHIP IS ESSENTIAL TO THE SOUL", Omega Psi Phi was born.

Over these 99 years of brotherhood, Omega has continued to flourish, largely because their Founders Love, Cooper, Coleman and Just were men of the very highest ideals and intellect. The Founders selected and attracted men of similar ideals and characteristics. It is not by accident that many of America's great black men are/were Omega Men. To this date, there are very few Americans whose lives have not been touched by a member of the Omega Psi Phi Fraternity.

Omega has a rich heritage to be protected, celebrated and enhanced!  Rooooo-Ooooooop!

COLEMAN LOVE

Miss Fix It On Duty

Kudos to all the ladies out there who knows what an exhaust pipe is, knows how to check her oil, has changed a flat tire and can listen to tell if she needs a new fan belt...

Because I CAN'T!

When God made the independent woman, He said she can pay her own bills and take care of herself... nowhere in there did He say she needs to know to change her oil every 3000 miles.  If she did that too, then what the heck is the MAN for??

Over the years, I have had so many issues with my car.. nothing extreme, but extreme enough!  Needing new brakes, needing a tuneup, needing new windshield wipers... who the heck invented the windshield wiper to fail!?!  I see the rain isn't being wiped away but when do you expect me to change it??  When its raining... nooo cuz I can't see to drive to Autozone... and do you really expect me to remember on a sunny day??

But wait, let me give myself some credit, I do get regular oil changes... not that I want to!!  An oil change is like 30 bucks (i think)... but I'd never know because every time I walk out of there, I've just spent 100 daggone dollars!!  Why??  Because I need new filters, I need a transmission flush, I need some exhaust thingy wiped down, swept out, rolled up and smoked for all I know.  It's ridiculous.  Then they bring out a piece of paper with some greenish-brownish corroded liquid wiped on it and say this is what your fluid looks like.. and right beside it is a bright orange fun colored fluid and they say, "And this is what your fluid SHOULD look like."  So what's a girl to say?  I can't let this Alpha male talking to me like he just rode up on a stoic steed ready to save the day.. I can't let him think I'm some irresponsible chic who knows nothing about nothing about my car.. "Oh yes of course Prince Mechanic, save me from that mean old corrosion and replace it with your 60 dollar liquid heaven."  Arrrggggggggggg...

And as of lately, my car has been making this whistling noise especially when I turn the corner... I know something's wrong, every passenger in my car can tell something is wrong... and every pedestrian at every corner can hear that something is definitely wrong... but when will I know for sure, the day I'm calling one of you for a ride cuz Shrek just broke down on me!  Pitiful I know... smh

So again, I'd like to give a shout out to ALL my ladies who keep jumper cables in their trunk, mini flashlights in the glove box and a monkey wrench in their handbag!  EYEListen.

Is that My Phone Ringing?

NOPE!

2days ago, I powered off my phone at 5am and have not looked back. 

My Issue:
I spend too much time using my phone... and not in the typical sense where I'm making and receiving calls.  But all those funky features cell phones have been blessed with have sucked me into a trap of addiction!  BBM is my high, the reason I may not pick my little brother up from school, the reason why my homework may not get done and all the other negligently forgotten things you see on the "Under the Influence" "Don't Smoke Weed" commercials.  Then there's my Spades game that I use to take a "break" right in the middle of every study session, every one fourth of the way thru every study session and conveniently three fourths way into every study session smh.  And of course we have the Sprint Navigation that has forced me to GPS EVERY destination and return home with no clue how I got there or got back.  Ummmm texting... not so much because all my "cool" friends use bbm lol... Oh the Internet, I have googled EVERYTHING... answers to questions my teachers ask, the word "juxtaposition", the best times to fly to a Caribbean island... all this while I should probably be doing something more important.  Then of course there's the random photo shoot we all take of ourselves when we claim we're bored.  Why is random nonsense a substitute for being bored?  I can't think of the other features that consume entirely too much of my needed time because it's now a thing of the past!

My Resolution:
I am the Cell Phone Boycott activist!  I have no intention on using my cell phone... indefinitely.  I use email and facebook as forms of communication to the outside world, if and only if I'm in the house.  And I call my mother from the house phone when I need to check up on my girl.  I make my plans before I leave out and I follow through with them.  I'm not calling when I'm on my way, either you're there or you're not.  I will mapquest directions if I absolutely need them.  Maybe I'll swing by the gas station and purchase a paper map (good idea!).  I'm still looking for a payphone in case of emergencies lol.

But WHY?
I need back ownership rights to my time.  I will be starting nursing school next fall and I need to factor out as many distractions as possible.  Even now, I need to make sure all my pre-reqs are passed with an A, not a B or B+, an A!  I have my photography that has taken a bit of the back burner since school has started.  I have my Rosetta Stone for learning French and I haven't touched it since February.  My piano lessons have fallen by the waist side... But hopefully all those things will resurface and consume my newly found idle time.  I will no longer be accessible to be sucked into useless events where my time won't be spent wisely.  I even read a book on Friday while in the doobie shop instead of playing spades on my phone or bbm'ing my life away!

I hung out with some old college buddies yesterday that I hadn't seen all year and I wasn't distracted by a useless phone call or random bbms.  So now if we spend time, my time is devoted to you, as it should be.  I went to a birthday dinner the other night for my best friend (I happen to leave my phone home that night) and I watched as the entire table focused 60% of their attention on their phones.  Not judging anyone, but we really need to get our focus back on what's important to us.

Don't mind me... just venting...

Bad Memory

never forget the ones who love you the most. the ones who care when the rest dont. the ones who have your back even when theirs is bare. never forget the ones who love you just because you're you. the ones who could love all the others or any other but carefully chose you to love. not because you are that dope. or cuz you think you're that dope. or cuz you think you're their best option. but because loving you compliments them loving themselves. never forget the ones who shared their last with you. gave you the best of them. and only wanted the best for you.
because if they so happen to disappoint you one day, hurt your feelings, say something they didn't mean or make you mad. hopefully you wont have a bad memory.

to all the men who forget those who love them the most. whether it is their mother, a close friend. or the girl who gave you her heart.

Quotes To Live By

"One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done."

- Marie Curie

2cents:

 Maybe you can relate.  I never really give myself credit for what tasks I've tackled, what obstacles I've conquered or what ground I have covered.  I always try to figure out what else needs to be done.  A good thing or bad?? I'm still trying to decide...

Latest idea on this: in a relationship, when your hunny is making changes for the betterment of the relationship, you may not notice because of blunt concentration on what's yet to be fixed...

For Your Special Birthday

A day at Church

To a special person from a special person….


I don’t have the riches or fortunes and I couldn’t care less for materialist things, but I do have what means most to me - a heart. With that, I wonder to myself, how can you make someone feel special on their birthday? And it's simple... just by letting them know how special and important they are to your world.


So here are a few words from my heart….


There is a very special person in my life and everyday I try to make a point of telling this person how much I care, love and how grateful I am to have him in my life.
As a parent, I don’t have an easy job and being a single parent makes it much harder. It may seem and or look easy with all the laughs and smiles but it really hurts sometimes; especially being a mom raising a little boy in this crazy world. There are thoughts on how I can teach him what’s right or wrong and most importantly, how to be a humbled God-fearing man. But I can attest that when you have faith and believe in God, He’ll answer prayers.


Soooo, when you entered my life and things didn’t go as I wanted them to I was tempted to give up on us. But I didn’t because I knew God had something much better in store for me, or better yet, for my son… something I longed for…. For him to have this father like, big brother like, mentor figure that he could look up too! To have someone who loves him unconditionally without the love depending on anything involving me. It was simply because that’s what was placed in your heart.
And down the line I found out that you guys were really the ones meant to be together. Since you’ve been here you’ve helped me in ways that I couldn’t or wouldn’t even be able to explain or possibly try to put into words. And the thoughts that once went though my mind have faded into the background. You’ve given me peace of mind and all of the worrying is gone because I know why you are here!!


Even though you weren’t here when the first tooth fell out you were here when the eighth tooth fell out. LOL (insider)!!! You’ve introduced my son to some cool people, some pretty women lol, you’ve spent countless days and nights with him and most importantly you’ve instilled going to church in him… something he loves more then anything .. I can really go on, and on …
But, I’ve said all this to say Ladun, you have a great heart, and I wanted to let you know that I value and appreciate our friendship much more than anything! And thank you tremendously for the loving relationship you have developed with Samajay!

SOOOOOO on this day I just want to tell you have a blessed HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!
I LOVE YOU!
Just ask “J” shelistens… EYEListen. =)


Thanks “J” and I love you too booo!! Muahhhhhhhhhh

Cheers to you Ladun !!

--

Contributed by Dominique

Sincerely, EX-Side Chick Employer

I will be closing...
 As one of the largest side chick employers in essex county I must announce today that I will be closing my doors for good.  Its not a sad day for me or the industry.  Just like other businesses the recession has caused some cutbacks but overall business has thrived and I'm sure will continue in my absence. To my colleagues, I extend my best wishes. I trust you will continue to produce the best side chicks in the world. I know you will continue to enforce the rules and help your temporary employees grow and advance into other fields. I also hope we can meet again in my new field and still flourish as we did in this one. To my employees..sigh...I knew this day would come..maybe some of you didn't think so..but I just hope I have prepared you all for it. I hope that thru our dealings that you have all grown to hate being a temp.  That your time under my contract has helped you realize what you want..and what you need to become a permanent full time wife.  I truly wish you the best.  Let it be known that you also helped me grow and realize that even though I was excellent at managing a number of contracts, there was also a glass ceiling in my position as a side chick employer.  You helped me see that even with many of you that I always needed more.  That as best as I could be was a bottom fortune 500 Temp agency who trained workers for other top fortune 500 companies.  With that said me closing the book on this venture is not a sad day but just a sign of my growth.  Last but not least to my new business partner..thank you for the opportunity to build something amazing with you. Thanks for seeing the potential in me and giving me a chance even though I have little experience in this field.  I won't let you down.

Sincerely,
Professor aka the Ex side chick employer

--

To fully understand the extremity of this business closing, read Professor's last post, The Side Chick Contract.

Professor's blunt humor and candid point of view never ceases to amaze me.  He has found love, so he has retired from his previous position to take on this promotion.  Good luck cuz and congrats on the Jr to come =)

Quotes To Live By

"You may not be her first, her last or her only.  She loved before she may love again.  But if she loves you now, what else matters?  She's not perfect - you aren't either, and the two of you may never be perfect together.  But if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can.  She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart.  So don't hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and dont expect more than she can give.  Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she's not there."

- Bob Marley

WillEYEListen, this is your life!

WillEYEListen, it has been one heck of a year... and this is your life!

Remember when:

November 2009 - A Star is born
Knock it off: Say No to Knock Offs
What is it about the fashion industry that has us so brain washed and desperate? Why do we want to pretend we can afford what is monetarily out of our reach? Cutting to the chase, why the hell do people rock knock offs?? READ MORE

December 2009
No More Pouty Men at the Mall
Asking your boo to accompany you to the mall is like your mom asking you as a child to make your own dentist appointment, pay for the copay, and follow up with all the future visits. Forget about it!! As soon as you saw the postcard with the devilishly smiling toothbrushes, you were ripping up the evidence and flushing it down the toilet. But hopeless boyfriends and husbands of the world aren't lucky enough to get postcard sized reminders of the big day when his woman wants to spend the whole damn day at the mall.  READ MORE

January 2010
I Just Wanna Know, Is She Cute?
What’s the first thing a girl does when:
A) her guy cheats
B) her ex moves on to the next
C) her new guy reveals who his ex is…
...she checks to see if she’s cute or not!! And nothing makes a girl feel more confident, cuter or superior to the rest, than to see that the “other” chic doesn’t measure up to her idea of beauty.  READ MORE

Febuary 2010
Year of the Underdog
So what your team didn’t make it to play in the Super Bowl yesterday =( You’ve got to admit, that was a great game! Great because two awesome quarterbacks (and a sexy Reggie Bush) went head to head, it was a damn good fight to the finish, and most importantly the underdogs prevailed. This is the year of the underdog!! This year all underdogs will be the cause of an upset. Like who, you ask?  READ MORE

March 2010
Minaj - A - Hunh?
Nicki, Nicki, Nicki. To like you or not to like you… that is the question. Ok, let’s cut to the facts.  READ MORE

April 2010
This is when my photography really kicked off.  Shots from my first chance at Street Photography... Shoots From Brooklyn's DUMBO... SEE PICS

May 2010
Do Ugly People Dump?
Whoooooaaaaa, where do I come off even using that word when I was raised by the Stick and Stones Manual!! I could have used unattractive, less beautiful, “nice personality”, but none of them have quite the same emphasis as UGLY. So with hopes of offending no one, I pose my question again, do ugly people dump??  READ MORE

June 2010
Baby Mama's Checklist
Firstly, I would like to point out that I have no kids! And not by accident, I intentionally have NO kids. And after doing a forecast of my near future, I see sunshine, a few clouds and still NO kids. And the sole reason I see NO kids is because I checked that finger in between my middle and my pinky fingers and noticed no bling bling, no sparkle, not even a twinkle. As corny as it may seem to you, I will not have kids until I am married and when you see me on The Tyra Show having triplets at 42, you can say, damn I knew that girl… READ MORE

July 2010 Month of photography
Mark Your Territory
Whether it’s a man protective over an ex-girl, a graffiti artist tagging up a freshly painted wall, a parent’s legacy through child, a dog doing his numbers... Or better yet, a powerful being making an impact.... You gotta Mark Your Territory... To let the world know, I AM HERE.  SEE PICS

August 2010
This post was a recap on my photography during the summer... C'est La Vie... SEE PICS

September 2010
Power of a Label
Right off the top, these quotes popped in my mind. The POWER of a label. Ahhhhhhhh... Ya know, labels define, right? They describe, inform and stamp an impression in your mind of what's to be expected. You can either control your own destiny by determining who you are, hence creating your own label... or you can have your image altered by what you let other people label you.  READ MORE

October 2010
And then everytime my blogging became scarce, I came up with better and better excuses for the bloglessness (yup, just made that word up!)  Something about me being the chosen one…lol... READ More Blogless Excuses

It has been one heck of a journey and a year never to be forgotten.  Can't thank everyone enough for sharing these laughs, tears and random thoughts... but in the humble words of rapper Drake, You can thank ME now =)  EYEListen.

Happy 1yr Anni WillEYEListen!!

HAPPY 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY WILLEYELISTEN

One year ago I sat in labor for several hours until a blog was born.  Brings a tear to my EYE to see the growth of my love and the growth of myself as a person.  Life over this past year has been AMAZING and I am so grateful to have WillEYEListen as an outlet.  It has never let me down!

BIG THANKS to all the supporters, commenters, guest bloggers, one time readers, avid readers and all in between!!  I do this selfishly for myself, to let off steam but I'm glad you all took interest in my thoughts and shared some of yours.  I don't write for popularity or hits on my site... this is strictly a journal for a day in the life (or the head) of Just "J"... Im so happy about what I've shared, both very personal and sometimes to get a few laughs.  I have a lot more to share and I hope you all continue on this journey with me... who knows I may be rich and famous one day and you already have a truckload of dirt to leak to the tabloids =)

I'm late for class right now because I wanted to give WillEYEListen a quick facelift... but later today I will do a post to recap all my favorite posts over the last 12 months.  Peek back in tonite...

Thanks again!! (right about now someone is suppose to hand me an award or something considering I just gave the acceptance speech for it lol) EYEListen.